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The blogger

I am transparent. What you see is what you get. Most of the time people don't understand me, or what I'm saying, but it's far simpler than what they think it is. I act like a kid all the time, finding pleasure in the simple things that life has to offer, because I find a curious freedom in being child-like. Most of the time you will see me with my head in the clouds, dreaming about the most impossible things like unicorns and giant butterflies. Every once in a while, my imagination goes berserk and if you happen to be with me during these times, you will find yourself in the midst of a fast whirling hurricane of ethereal things and ideas. I love to lose myself in the music of everyday life for i believe that every moment of our life here on earth is worth living.

I am me.

Melissa Arcadio Pazcoguin

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Email: issa_pazcoguin@yahoo.com
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12:39 PM // May 5, 2007
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DISCLAIMER:

My Final Soliloquy is my site. Everything is made by myself unless otherwise stated. As usual, cyberspace etiquette is a must. Don't take anything, don't copy and don't hotlink. Ideas, images and text are my property. If you want something, then drop me an email at issa_pazcoguin@yahoo.com

Uncertainty

Monday, April 02, 2007

There's just one thing that I need to feel before I walk away against my will.

This song's been stuck in my head for the past 2 days. You see, I decided to watch again the whole lot of Grey's Anatomy and I stumbled upon this song in one of the episodes in Season 2. It's the episode wherein Shepherd and Grey need to operate on an Asian girl but can't because she lost one of her "souls" so they brought in a shaman to perform a ritual to find it before the operation.

What does it mean to lose one of your souls? And exactly how many souls reside in one person? Maybe there's a soul for every organ in our body, and maybe there's also one for every emotion that we feel. If that's the case, then I think I might be losing one of my souls now. You see, there's been precious little to be happy about in my life in the past few weeks.

I buried 2 relatives last week. The last of my grandparents, my dad's mum, died 2 Saturdays after last. She was 100 years old and was already pushing towards 101 hadn't she died 5 days short of her birthday. Then on the Wednesday after last, we got a call from Cavite, saying that my Tita Linda died too. She's my mother's cousin and sister-in-law. We had to shuffle back and forth from Cavite to Quezon City almost everyday until we buried them last week.

I don't know what I'm hanging on to right now. To see people that I love ripped from my life that sudden made me think about what I have done with my life. It is not enough. Nothing I do will ever be enough for you, for anyone, for love.

The memory of this still reminds me of you.


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sweetsunnyissa blogged on 7:22 PM